the facebook mirror

Haven't posted a bit but things have been going on.
My last post was a little disjointed so let me clear it up.

On facebook, I added a bunch of Paul Caballero's to see if the life i'm living here is similar to the life I'm living in other bodies in other parts of the world. Apparently, I'm pretty much the same everywhere.

The most disturbing me is a Christian living in texas that does not write very well. He will go silent for a while then go on jags where he posts how great god is and to follow the word. Three four posts in ten minutes. Scary.

When I see him post I'm fascinated but scared. Is there part of me in there too? Probably. As we will see, definitely.

Broke up with the girlfriend. It's been a few weeks. I've been down but handling it.

Checking facebook...What do I see...these are direct quotes from psycho christian me...

BrokeN
This is for the broken hearted.
I know how you feel. Empty, betrayed, and no happiness whatsoever. You don't want to laugh, because you know it's not going to help, but you don't want to cry, because it will just make you feel worse. You feel like your heart is falling apart, but not only that, but you know soon your life is going to feel like it's falling apart too.

then days later...

You were my first love
The earth moving under me
Bedroom scent, beauty ardent
Distant shiver, heaven sent

followed by...

i feel so broken inside that it making me cry they said a man does cry i do that a lie when u love someone u cry like a babe plz can one or two of my tell me what to do

Holy shit...!
I'll spare the previous posts where in the space of 20 hours he professes his love for the girl that was his new girlfriend and now it's busted on the side of the road. I remember being that paul caballero...Not too long ago...whoa...

I wrote poems, I cried until my cheeks hurt but fuck I didn't even think I could remember those times.

I posted on the christian me's page to hang on, let it feel as bad as it does because it will get better.

I learned that lesson but wow...to see me having to learn it again....from far away...wow....

the internet is a strange place...